“One of these Kids is Doing His Own Thing…” Thoughts from Sesame Street
I was born in the late seventies, people. That means I grew up wearing Wonder Woman Underoos, sneaking Tab colas with my buddies from the Fridge at church (shhh, we’re probably going to hell for that one) and eating bologna sandwiches on white bread with my friends while braiding each other’s hair into “Princess Leia” style buns, and of course, watching Sesame Street as a kid.
One of my favorite catchy little Sesame Street jingles was a quick little snippet where the screen is divided into four squares. In 3 of the squares, there are some kids doing a similar activity, and in one of the squares, there is a kid doing something completely different. It goes like this:
“Three of these Kids Belong Together
Three of these Kids are Kind of the Same.
But one of these Kids is Doing His Own Thing
Now it’s time to play our game…
Which of these Kids is Doing His Own Thing
Can you guess which kid is doing his own thing?
Before my song is done? And now my song is done!”
It’s not a particularly profound little song, after all, it is geared toward preschoolers, but I find it interesting.
As a mother of what is considered to be, at least where I live, a somewhat large family, I have definitely felt like the kid doing my own thing. Having six kids does not go unnoticed in most public places.
I can’t even begin to count how many times I have been at a store with a shopping cart the size of Mt. Everest, chock full of stuff and someone has commented on the size of my cart. “Doin’ the ‘big shop’, today, eh?” Or “Looks like someone is having a party!” Almost. Every. Single. Time. And the times where they don’t comment, they sigh behind me. Due to the sigh-factor, I started letting others go ahead of me in line, until I realized that after a couple of people went before me, I was never going to get out of there if I didn’t eventually check out. So then I’m back to feeling badly again.
I’ve also learned at times how wrong I can be. Once at the airport, we were running a bit behind schedule (shocker!) and I was kind of over it…. Over the stares, over the sighs. I caught an older couple looking at us, pointing and whispering. Instead of being kind and just keeping to my own business, I said in a flat, not-super-kind tone, “May I help you with something?” A huge smile spread across the woman’s face and she said, “I was just telling my husband how nice it is to see a big family these days. We had six kids too, and I rarely see families of 8 out and about. You remind us of our life when we had young ones!” Then she added, (and here’s where I cringed), “You’re doing a great job, mom!” Tears filled my eyes and I sheepishly mumbled, “Thank you,” totally embarrassed at how wrong I was in my assumption.
I have found it to be true in my life that I will find what I seek. If my brain is convinced that everyone is staring and annoyed, I will look for it, without even consciously trying. And I will definitely find it. Something that was never truth in the first place, will become truth for me and I will believe it. Suddenly I will find myself in a resentment that I have fed, watered, coddled and grown…. Out of nothing at all. Out of something that was never really there in the first place. So I then have created a negative mindset out of absolute thin air. Reading people and life’s circumstances out of scratched, dirty lenses. I can’t see clearly, and I’ve subconsciously chosen to see it through a marred, erroneous haze. And OMG I’m mortified to admit how may times I’ve done this along life’s way.
This is where I need to remember what my role is: to stay inside my own hula hoop, mind my own business, and be kind always. And finally, to assume the best in people. After all, isn’t that what I want? To be given the benefit of the doubt? To have people give me grace and realize that I won’t be sweet and make good choices all the time, and I need others to just forgive my humanity?
In that way, perhaps we are all connected. There is nothing that unites us more than our humanity, yes? We all have lives, feelings, some have higher sensitivities and “feel them” more than others. We all have been ill at some point, to some degree, whether it’s been physically, mentally or emotionally or all of the above. We’ve all gotten angry, nay, completely beyond pissed at one point over something or someone. We’ve all gone totally nuts to some degree and taken a whirl on the crazy-coaster with whatever our brand of crazy may have been or may be. (OK, maybe it’s just me. ;) OK, as I leave my soapbox, now let’s all embrace and sing “Hands Across America” followed by a moving rendition of “We Are the World.” (Look it up, young readers born in the nineties or thereafter.)
Sidenote: “We Are the World” was the second tape—read: cassette tape—I ever bought with my own cold hard cash. The first was “Wham! Make it Big”. Oh yeah I was makin’ it big alright, with my $1.00 fee per hour of babysitting. I worked like 12 hours for that George Michael tape and it was freaking worth it, Dammit.
So… in closing, I think I’m only “opposite” from anyone if I choose to see myself that way. I can focus on the differences, or I can focus on the similarities. I can choose to see something negatively or I can change up my perspective and look for the best in people, places, and things. Either way, I believe I will find what I’m looking for.
OK, since typing that part about the Wham! tape, I’ve been stricken with a sudden onset case of ADD and now “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” is stuck in my head, I literally can’t think about anything else so I guess I’m done. Such is my brain. Muah.
XOXO,
A-Team Mom